Hey Guys
Once again, Moosey is here breaking her own ideals that one shall not post anything that does not have any purpose whatsoever... But my burfday's on Friday, and I miss you all so!
Muchos lovers, and add me on MySpace: myspace.com/hazzah357
~ Sad Moosey ~
14 comments:
OMFG!!!! YOUR BURFDAY?!?
AHHHHH! *runs to WMM* I shall make you the BEST burfday montage everr! squee. I love you! <3
Shut up it's my bday on friday 2!
Aw, lovers you, Taylor! You're doing such a great job here, but I WILL be back over the summer. I just can't stay away forever!
Nava: Whoa! Hehe, I know a few of my friends' parents with my birthday, but nobody else with b-days on 4/20. Such a screwy day, really. I mean, Hitler's Birthday, the day of the Columbine shootings, and Pot Head/Get High day. Hm.
Happy (Almost) Birthday!
lolol! latin sytycd clown krumping!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39X4oGab8Sk
yay i just added u like yesterday!!!...im ~jenny~ in the green top with my head tilted to the side like im gangsta...lol...i luv myspace
Happy birthday to moosey and nava! hope it's a great one!
new benji blog. he's in love & he's feeling kinda up & down about a lot of things. i say, let's just leave him alone & let's stop speculating. i feel so sad for him after reading this. poor thing & to answer his question...yes benji dear, i will still love you tomorrow.
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Friday, April 20, 2007
will you still love me?*************
Current mood: working
Ringing and ringin throughout my head have the lyrics in the great Carole king's song "will you love me tomorrow". its something i've thought about a lot latelt...amidst my crazy travels and hectic schedual. I don't have much time to write or speel check so please forgive me for my shortcomings.
its been a while...i know...im learning that i need to try and sleep...my body has been making me sleep...i nearly hit a boiling point and i think my body finally had enough and said "no myspace for you!" hehehe so yeah, I've been trying to cut back for my health guys...i can only write in the wee hours so ive been, much better...although i should be packing right now...so ive messed up this once for all ya'll...you know there much love to the fans.
which brings me back to carole king...
many many events have taken place in the recent month ive been away...too many to list in fact but i want to show a big emphasis on time...and what it does to people.
Take you for example...
you're reading my blog...probably due to one of many things...
1. you watched so you think you can dance
2. you think im funny
3. you're bored
4. you're obsessed with me
5. you think im cute
6. you respect my opinion
7. you're waiting for me to spill a secret: whether it be about future plans, answering to rumors, confessing my love to a certain someone, etc. etc.
in no way am i saying that all of the above reasons are bad...infact most of them are great and i concider great compliments to the hard work ive put in both my spiritual education, dance, art, and humanitarian efforts. so kudos to you all in those aspects... my love and appreciation to you all.
i have recnetly recieved a horrible email, more of an eye opener...
it stated that this girl "idolized" me.
and she was serious...and told me so then said i was a crock and a hypocrite. i laughed at it...because i really could care less about crabby people. but something did call m=out to me in that letter...a select few idolize me...
im here to say that for you few...please don't. im nothing but 23 year old dude who happens to have gotten a little fame thru his "God-given"...(*emphasis on God) talents. If you feel connected to me or have felt good about something i've done...its not directly from me...its all about the man upstairs. I am simply nothing. So red alert before someone becomes bitter that i posted something uncharacteristic of "Benji". Umm last time i checked its uncharacteristic of me to do something characteristic of Benji...
"will you still love me tomorrow?"
also...some of you are diehard fans of sytycd. SO Am I! I basically love the show...think its amazing...know all the dances from season 1...lol...amazing. I have had the opportunity to meet nearly everyone from that cast...its weird cuz im apart of that same show and have even recieved more press, accolades and even votes than any of the other competitors (SO FAR)...but im still in awe of them. They are my peers...but now, I also call many of them friends and that feeling has died down of hype and more humane feelings of respect and friendship have come into place. I feel that most of my "fans" have or will get more into that phase...than anyother if they are truley die hard. If not...ill probably be mentions now and then...but what once was "benji wall paper on my myspace page" will turn into "oh yeah the guy who won second season"......
Im well aware of that...
"will you still love me tomorrow?"
maybe some of you will...Ive seen many of you order my instructional dvds...come to workshops and actually use me as a doorway to the wonderful world of dancing...and in all honesty, aside from getting the itch to donate to demand and other charities, i think thats the coolest non spiritual influence i could ever have on someone. Dancing is my life and its so great to be a part of this profession....with or without titles accolaides and crazy screaming fans...
im not perfect...im very imperfect infact. i tend to have gas alot...lol and i sometimes snip at people who bug me...I try and be gracious as i can, but some people are so blatantly rude when they approach me its sad...because i begin to shatter their "squeaky clean image" of "benji". I was and still am accessable 24/7 to the world via tv and internet. But i am only a human being. There is only one of me. I cannot take the time one takes to get to know one person when i have a separate life of my own filled with loved ones and people i barely get to see. I recently was at a dance convention. Its really easy to see who are my true friends and who are trying to be because of my temporary fame staus...also those that basically are very green with envy...and have nothing but negative things to say like " fame has changed him" and "he has changed so much...he's not the benji he used to be"........
well let me set the record straight:
I AM NOT THE SAME PERSON I WAS, NOR DO I FEEL THAT ITS A BAD THING!
I am me...in fact the more constant parts and essences that compile up and are "me" are still there.....
I am an active member of the Church of Jesus Christ OF Latter Day Saints. So I've never drank, or smoked or done drugs. I've never had sex. I am waiting for marriage. My fondest memories take place in Oaxaca, mexico, second most on the dance floor.
I am crazy, and love to make people laugh...especially those who i trust and love.
I love raising money and other things for the needy. Helping my fellow man. D.E.M.A.N.D. is going very strong! I am in love with dance....all art forms really but dance especially. I love it all...west coast swing will always be my heart, but other forms as well now take great passion in my life...I am a free spirit...I am quick witted...I am very honest...and i know what i want in life.
So yeah those things are still the same ol benji...but im also busier now...im looking towords the future a bit more...saving my money and not spending it on random wastes. I tend to spend more time rehersing and training and teaching then i do sleeping. I am constantly thinking about projects in my head...i tend to not have my phone on because i need to concentrate at time, and I can't play with friends because i dont have as much downtime. When i am in a convention room...i cant socialize like i used to...1, every minute and hour has something booked to it.....2, when i do speak with people i dont know very well...i end up hearing the same question "so what are you doing now? tell us your future plans?!?!?!" ...sorry it may sound weird and as if im biting the hands that have put me on this pedestal but I really dislike repeating myself my great plans so often that they become to familiar and not great to me anymore. I sometimes have to say..."i really dont wanna talk about that" and people give me the most aweful looks and insult me very quickly. I was watching students of mine perform and was asked a question similar to that one and i had said...well Im sorry but i realy dont want to talk about that right now" he flicked my ear and said i owed it to him because he donated money to DEMAND.......HOW SICK IS THAT? so yeah i can be a little upset about that stuff. Ive learned to respect myself and not be a monkey to people as much as i used to be. I used to be a more "kill em with kindness" now im more of a "honesty is the best policy"...and for me its been quite liberating. should i be cold? no. should i be rude? no should i expect to take 5 minutes with everyone i see in a room and repeat the same darn thing all the while i should be somewhere rehersing or teaching? NO NO NO...sorry if that sounds rude, but im being very honest. i was filmed on tv as the obedient kid...I was being taught by professionals who i respected dearly...now, Im normally in the position of being the teacher and choreographer...some people don't get the fect that i wear many hats...I know when to be quiet and when to voice my own opinion and that comes as a big shock for many peeps.
"will you still love me tomorrow?
maybe you will....maybe you wont. I just hope a few things...
that people will stop idolyzing me.
that people will be understanding of my time and my personal life/friends pre sytycd
that people wont mistake what i just said as me being ungreatful for all the support and work many pf ou have put into me and my causes
that people will find balance
that people will understand that i am only a man...accept me as you would a family member...flaws and all and don't get upset if you dont like my song i choose or a picture i took, cuz frankly i know my intentions and you can guess all you want but you don't know jack(jack who? never heard of him!...hahah i kid)
that people will come here because they are friends...even on a fan feel only...not because they expect me to get married to someone from the tv show and force that apon me thinking they know me well enough to choose who i date and/or love.
I am in love...but people need to understand that my life is not a reality show. and I won't mix that side which is something i hold sacred to be ravenged by wolves.
"will you still love me tomorrow?"...indeed i know atleast someone will.
I owe a big thank you to everyone who comes here....I hope you all continue to do so!
I actually love myspacing...i don't know anyone who is as in touch with his/her fans than i am...and although i feel sometimes as if when you give a cookie to mouse hes gonna want a glass of milk, 90% of the time i spend here is not only fun but theraputic.
Now an update outside of all this...(if any of you care...lololol jut messing)
I am very happy these days. I am in love. I am also in love with dancing. To the point that I would turn down a movie if it meant that i would not take dancing to different heights. I dont have some movie and tv plans...but dancing is my professional and artistic priority. I have grown up so much in the last few months with my dancing...and i have the great honor to be sharing that with the world. Im loving choreography and performing and working with the media as well.
Im now just so used to sleeping on planes more than i do in my own bed...its kinda fun the gypsy lifestyle...atleast for the time being!
I do wish that dance would be even bigger than it is...although im not upset by the sttention its already getting...guess i have to do better, guess we all do. I am really excited for some certain people trying out for SYTCD 3... i can't wait to cheer EVERYONE on...yes everyone...im not biased like "some people" (ahem!)
opps anywho...going to reno in a few hours...then to singapore...just finished my tvland performances....yes im back woods...yes i am a brady now as well...lol pics on that will be posted soon.
also big thanks to the new videos and pics....you guys are so talented...ive gotten presents on both my b-day, holidays and other special occasions...thanks you all so much...I have seen them and have them...nd am really appreciative of them although they are not necessary at all. i feel so much love from so many people i truley feel very blessed to have you all.
I am over being sad about past relationships and also being competetive...those regretful feeling were the origional reasons behind my tranining...now its just a pure love of dance and art...and ive grown so much because of it. i feel free in all i do now in movement...its such a wonderful thing.
i do have to get packing if i want to sleep at all...really excited about my show tomorrow. gonna be fun in reno...
peace and love...
my best to all those going thru hard times related to the shootings...
demand is on the way...thats all i have to say...
more updates soon...
will you still love me?
benji! ;)
as much as i completely sympathise with benji, i can't help but feel somewhat miffed that he chose to refer to dony as "someone" in his entry. e.g.1: "...confessing my love to a certain someone..." & again, "...expect me to get married to someone from the tv show...". guess i'm one of those crappy fans who take every little detail seriously, but seriously, friends should be refered to by their names.
I got bored and made a benjelletage in honour of your attempt to get 1000 post before season 3(if you'd like to post it that is).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCW2mVGugTo
Happy Birthday Moose and Nava!
my God, that was a long blog.
happy birthday, moose and nava!!!!!!!!
man.. no more obsession... or what he doesn't know can't hurt him =)
he seems sad, i kinda feel like he wants to bite the benjellers head off =/ i was so sure benji was perfect... ahh i still love him.. not idolize
Happy Birthday Moose and Nava!
Have a wonderful one!!
I still like you benji, I don't idolize you, cause I don't idolize ppl, and if I did it would be someone I knew personally.
Anyway, how many times can one person say I'm in love?
I knew this day would come, so I am prepared (luckily) and I know they were meant to be, so Benji, glad you are happy, and whatever makes you happy so be it.
But I will somewhere inside of me, still be a Benjeller, I won't forget...
Also, we are not forcing anything upon you cause we really don't really know you on a personal basis, we are just saying what will eventually happen. Saying is one thing, forcing is another. We are by no means telling you and forcing upon you going to a special someone and w.e. none of that. Cause in forcing ppl sometimes do do it...
And I'll stop there.
I still like you!!
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